Okay, Fine Lisa Gard!

So, my bff noticed that I hadn't posted since September.  A lot has happened since then, but blogging... not so much.  We did manage to get the entire family into the same photo during our Thanksgiving celebration.  This will also be on our Christmas card since all six of us in the same room is a rarity.  That is quite sad, actually.  Daniel's arrival and the busyness that has surrounded that has taken some of the sting out of Hayden's move out of the house.  (His laundry still shows up once a week, so there's that...)

Thanksgiving weekend we also had THIS going on.

Which, of course, meant we were eating THIS.  For the non-Ethiopian food-educated among us, that is a very traditional meal.  We are blessed to have the African Restaurant in Lincoln.  They make food that Daniel simply loves.  It's all about presentation, wouldn't you agree?

Our boy turned seven. It was interesting to see a birthday through his eyes.  Approaching the birthday, he asked questions like, "Who blows out the candles?" The owner of the above-mentioned restaurant said that birthdays aren't celebrated in Ethiopia.  They might be casually mentioned, but not celebrated.  Because Daniel had no expectations, he was thrilled with the day.  We kept it intentionally low-key.  The day before had been Thanksgiving with its hype, food, crowd, etc.  On his birthday, he opened his gifts (A #3 Husker jersey was a big hit.), watched the Big Red beat Iowa, played football with his neighbors, went to eat Ethiopian food, and ate cake.  Happy Birthday, Daniel.

Daniel's six-month-home mark will be December 15.  It's amazing how quickly the time has gone and yet how much a part of our family he has become.

Okay, Lisa.  There it is.

Sometimes You Have to be a Bad Parent to be a Good Parent

This morning was one of those mornings.  The mornings that I just know I'm being judged and found wanting by Daniel's teacher and the other adults that saw Daniel at school.

It began with me being in the lead in the board game we were playing before school.  Daniel and I were the only ones home.  He won the first game by a large margin.  I was leading the second game, so Daniel decided to stop trying.  Then he decided to stop playing all together.  I put the game away.  Then, when I wasn't looking, he hid his glasses.  After I won that short battle of wills, we started getting ready to walk out the door for school.

I asked him if he wanted to go outside and see if he needed a jacket.  

"No jacket."

"It's chilly; you might want to check."

"No jacket."

"Okay, well how about I put your jacket in your backpack just in case you change your mind later."

"No.  No jacket to school."

So, we went to school without any jacket.  As we approached the drop-off area, I mentioned to Daniel that everyone was wearing jackets.  He looked at me with very wide eyes.  Possibly considering for the first time that his punishing me for winning the board game might come back to haunt him.

"Bye Daniel.  Have a good day at school.  I love you."

What did his teacher think when he showed up in 50-degree weather without a jacket?  I'll never know as I hope to refrain from defending myself at Parent/Teacher Conferences in a few weeks.  We'll see if I can win that internal battle of wills.  

I would much rather that Daniel win this battle today when it's 50 degrees if it allows me to win the war when it's 30 degrees.  I'll keep you posted.

Daniel, Chase and Cleo

With Uncle Brian at Rachel's wedding.  Daniel was very impressed with both the Chinese buffet and the candy.

 

Cousins.  Yep, family gatherings are going to be very interesting for awhile.

9 Weeks Home

Daniel and Mrs. Olsen

 

Daniel and Uncle Brian

Daniel has been home 9 weeks, and one of the things I've learned is that I'm not a very good blogger.  I often think about doing it, but don't seem to actually sit down and do it!
Overall, everything about our transition is going very well.  We're still struggling with his pouting, but we always remind ourselves that pouting is much better than a tantrum.
Daniel started school on Tuesday.  We started with about 2 hours and 15 minutes/day.  On Friday, we let him stay all day.  Due to various doctors appointments next week, he will miss Monday and Thursday, but we'll probably go all day the other three days.  He really likes it, so far.  I wish the excitement he feels for school now could last a LONG time.

Home One Month. How did we celebrate?

What Daniel will most-likely recall about recent days, unfortunately, probably isn't the fun birthday party of my great-niece and great-nephew. He'll probably remember his first visit to the doctor. Six "sticks" tend to stick in the mind of a six-year old. He's about in the 10th percentile for both height and weight, but the pediatrician was quick to point out that the scale is based on American and western European norms. His TB skin test will be read tomorrow, but he sent us for a chest X-ray, anyway. Oh, did I forget to mention that I get to collect three consecutive stool samples? Good times. Another favorite of mine is how the nurse (probably is required to)treats us like newbie parents and reads page after page of diet, exercise and safety guidelines. Yep. Good times. Daniel was exhausted by bed time. I could relate. The good news? He takes liquid Advil like a trooper.

3 Weeks Home - And Hayden has Arrived!

Daniel has been in Nebraska three weeks.  In some ways it's gone super-fast, but it also seems like he's been part of our family forever.  Hayden left for a Brazil outreach trip the day before Daniel got home from Ethiopia.  Yesterday was the first time they had met.

 Here they are bonding over "Curious George."

 Daniel really enjoyed the Independence Day fireworks.

 These two are of Daniel scootering in the driveway.  He has worked hard to master this skill!  He doesn't argue about the helmet anymore, either.

 Finally, we're all together!

We sort of have a "waiting for the other shoe to fall" feeling because the three weeks have gone so incredibly well.  His pouting has lessened but not disappeared completely.  He still sleeps and eats well.  In fact, if his mood is out-of-whack, food is usually what he needs.
We have an appointment with the eye surgeon at the end of July.  Our regular eye guy says surgery will be necessary.  I'm almost relieved.  Fighting the finding and wearing of glasses... not sure how that would go.
His language continues to expand daily.  He can put together a short sentence and seems to understand and respond to a lot of what we say.  That's pretty cool!

"So Good!"

"So good!"  These were Daniel's words, repeated several times, as he was eating at The African Restaurant here in Lincoln.  The above picture is him going at the left-overs the next day.

One Week at Home

Last evening marked the one week point of having Daniel at home in Nebraska.  Every day has been filled with numerous blessings, lots of laughter, new discoveries, and a rough spot or two.  Overall, we've had a solidly good week.
Yesterday was the toughest day we've had, so far.  But even that was very do-able because #1 - it wasn't constantly rough, and #2 - he's such a good sleeper at night that we are all physically able to handle the day.
I believe at the root of the issue was that there was someone new in the house for a good portion of the day.  Every other Friday my parents drive from Kearney to Lincoln so my father can do his chaplain work in the prisons in Lincoln.  From 8 a.m. to about 3:30 p.m., my mom hangs out here at the house.  This was the first time Daniel had met Grandma, and he was off his game from the beginning.  He had more of what we refer to as "pouting" than other days.  He warmed up to Grandma, showing her photos, looking at books, etc. But even after my parents left, the pouts continued. 
The complete melt-down came later in the evening.  Dennis had heard Daniel say "ice cream" when pointing to a picture of ice cream in one of the airports during travel.  We asked Daniel if he wanted to go get some ice cream.  He was excited to go, but when we got to Sonic and the ice cream arrived, it apparently wasn't what he thought it was going to be (soft serve instead of hard packed? with hot fudge instead of plain?).  We couldn't convince him to even try one bite.
He began whimpering on the drive home.  By shower time it was a full-on cry, only the 2nd time he's cried since he's been here.  After his shower, I took him out to the deck and just held and rocked him for a time, all nestled under a blanket.  Dennis came out to sit with us, and our cat, Cleo, jumped up on Dennis.  Cleo and Dennis began to play, and soon Daniel was laughing again.
I thought it wonderful that we were able to end the day in a good mood.